Keep the Ball!

September 25, 2025

The late great Yankee's public address announcer Bob Sheppard used say that a baseball that went into the stands was the greatest souvenir a fan could possibly receive. It was part of his daily public address to the crowd as he warned the spectators to be aware of balls being batted into the crowd and to not interfere with a ball that may still be in play. I was reminded of this the other day when a fan was lucky enough to catch Giancarlo Stanton's 450th career homerun. Not only did the fan not keep the ball, he gave it back to Stanton for a photo op and a signed bat. Are you fucking nuts kid? Or more importantly, a note to the parents of said kid...are you fucking stupid?!

I can't blame the kid, he doesn't know any better and I'm sure he was starstruck when the opportunity arose to meet the gigantic overpaid designated hitter. But the parents? Dude, come on...you just gave a millionaire another million dollars! Listen, if this was the 1950's when the players were paid shit and could have used the extra cash a ball like that could fetch, I could understand it. But let me lay it out to you plain and simple, Stanton makes 25 million dollars a year to play a child's sport. And he only plays the field in case of emergency...such as when Aaron Judge hurt his arm earlier this season and had to briefly become the DH.

To put this into perspective, Stanton is currently on track to have about 250 at-bats this year give or take. This means that this season he makes $100,000.00 every time he steps up to the plate. ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS! Only 41 human beings have ever managed to hit 450 home runs in a career in the majors. That means that ball that you just gave back to him will most likely fetch upwards of a million at auction. Holy crap. Did you think this through? You could have paid off your house, maybe put in a nice inground pool, and sent your kid to college for that! Hope your 15 minute photo op was worth it dipshits! You best display that signed bat loud and proud!

And shame on Giancarlo Stanton for not ponying up for that ball...or at least offering. On October 1, 1961 Roger Maris broke Babe Ruth's single season homerun record by launching his 61st into the stands. The young man who caught it offered the ball to Maris (who made a paltry $38,000 at the time). Maris refused and told the fan to keep it, because one day it would be worth a lot of money. Wow, what a time to be alive! A time when sports figures weren't paid more per at bat than the average person makes in a year, and when greed didn't consume human decency.

I'm sure Stanton threw it on the pile when he got home...or better yet put it up for auction at Sotheby's! God knows the poor fella could use a few extra bucks! Unreal.

Oh Balls! My basket of broken dreams.