Going, Going...Gone!

April 25, 2025

Have you ever hit a homerun? I suggest you try it. I realize how silly that sounds. But not many people can claim this accomplishment. It's like scoring a goal, getting laid, winning the lottery and vanquishing your enemies all at once. I managed to hit 11 in my youth and none since!

Don't think for a second that I've given up! Oh, no, no no! I'm still waiting for that pitcher to hang that curveball when I know damned well it's coming. For that's the trick, isn't it? To see it coming and have a battle plan. Here it comes, your eyes peeled wide open...your smile widens and you take a round bat and hit a round ball squarely. And out of the park it goes.

As you take your first few steps towards first, you see the pitcher slunk his head, you see the outfielders' backs as they run towards the fence and there it goes. Oh, to round those bases with the crowd on its feet, cheering your insane achievement. My lord, what a feeling. To hit a homer, to get the best of your opponent. With each step you take you think of all the times you have failed so miserably.

But man, oh man, for those 30 seconds you are the greatest man alive. You are at your very best. I have hit 11. I hope I have a few more in me before it's all said and done.

Tis a fine piece of lumber! The bat is not too shabby either!