A Real American Hero

March 3, 2025

The greatest toy line of all time, hands down, was the 1980's reboot of G.I. Joe from Hasbro. Argue with me all you want, go ahead and try to prove me wrong! I double dog dare ya! What's my proof? Is it that they had to gumption to sell a six foot long aircraft carrier that nobody could ever find a place to display because of its ridiculous size? No, that's not it at all. Don't be silly.

My proof, which will definitely hold up in a court of law, is none other than William "Refrigerator" Perry of the Chicago Bears. That's right, the Fridge himself. What other toy line in the history of mankind can boast a 3-and-3/4 inch action figure of the Fridge holding a football on a long stick as his weapon of choice? To go from winning a Superbowl with the Bears in 1985 to fighting with the Joes against that dastardly Cobra is a testament to his bravery and patriotism for sure!

As we live in a dystopian world far from the roaring 80's, we think back to simpler times when somebody like the Fridge and his dangerous "football on a stick" weapons technology briefly saved us from tyranny. We ask, Mr. Fridge, where have you gone? And can you save us from the nitwits that have taken over our world? Or, at the very least, can you let us borrow your football on a stick so we can start kicking some ass?

Go Joe!!

You mess with the USA, you get the stick! Yo Joe!!